2024 May Monthly Blog Seven

Childhood trauma leading to adult pain.

It is undeniable that childhood trauma doubles risk of mental health conditions.

From the publication Psychology Today in 2023 is the following extract, ‘The effects of childhood trauma are often longstanding and chronic. Adult survivors of complex childhood trauma can struggle with processing what they survived in childhood, which can lead to a host of emotional, psychological, and physical symptoms. Equally common are histories of toxic romantic relationships, poor choices in friends, and patterns of self-sabotage based on shame and guilt for what they survived.’

The word ‘trauma’ seems dramatic but in fact It’s important to realise that trauma affects individuals differently, and there’s no universal rule as what might be traumatic for one person may not have the same impact on another.

That is why as Counsellors and Psychotherapists, we may soon come to find that Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE’s) are far more common than we once supposed.

For example, in 2019, a UK-Based Study on Trauma and Mental Health funded by the Medical Research Council (MRC) found that almost a third of young people in the UK experience trauma during childhood or adolescence.

So, if you have ever wondered at the curious or unpredictable behaviour (maybe aggression) of friends, colleagues or complete strangers, long delayed emotional response to past trauma may be at the heart of it.   A delayed emotional response is one in which individuals experience an emotion after the event or situation has passed.  There is usually a trigger of some new event that takes an adult person back to a significant or painful memory they have denied to their conscious mind.

Delayed emotional responses can manifest themselves in many different ways, and it is important to understand what causes delayed emotional responses and how they can be managed.  This is where a counsellor or psychotherapist can be of invaluable help.  A quotation by Carl Rogers illustrates this: “When the other person is hurting, confused, troubled, anxious, alienated, terrified; or when he or she is doubtful of self-worth, uncertain as to identity, then understanding is called for. The gentle and sensitive companionship of an empathic stance… provides illumination and healing. In such situations deep understanding is, I believe, the most precious gift one can give to another.”
― Carl R. Rogers

Carl R. Rogers, was a prominent American psychologist, one of the founders of humanistic psychology and he founded and developed person centred therapy, in which he emphasized the importance of empathy and understanding in human interactions. His approach focused on creating a safe and empathetic space for clients to explore their feelings, thoughts, and experiences. Rogers believed that genuine understanding and acceptance could lead to personal growth and healing.

In a world where judgment and criticism often prevail, Rogers’ words remind us of the transformative power of compassion and deep listening. When we truly understand another person’s pain or struggle, we offer them a gift beyond measure—a connection that transcends words and reaches the core of our shared humanity.

We can leave the final words on compassion to Carl Jung:

“Thinking is hard, that’s why most people judge.” – Carl Jung