2024 September MONTHLY BLOG ELEVEN
Why is the relationship between Counsellor and Client vital for successful therapy?
Mainly due to pressures of time I have here reproduced an article by Joshua Miles (Accredited Psychodynamic Psychotherapist) titled Why the therapeutic relationship matters? published on 29-06-2015 in the Counselling Directory. I cannot improve on it except to offer that the therapeutic relationship is essential because without it there is no recovery.
Joshua Miles “The therapeutic relationship is the connection and relationship developed between the therapist and client over time. Without the therapeutic relationship, there can be no effective or meaningful therapy. This applies to all forms of counselling and psychotherapy, and regardless of the theoretical orientation of your therapist or counsellor, the relationship developed between you will be considered of high importance.
A strong bond is crucial to the success of counselling and psychotherapy. It can be especially valuable to clients who may have struggled to form relationships in their past, and those who experienced traumatic events in their early years, leading them to find it difficult to form relationships in adulthood. Therapy allows clients the chance to explore their relational attachments, bonds and experiences through their relationship with their therapist, which is why this relationship is so important.
The therapeutic relationship is unique in that for many clients, it may be one of the first times they have formed an intimate connection with another person, where the feelings, thoughts or ideas have been allowed to be heard, understood and valued, and where they have not had to censor themselves.
Often is the case that those people engaging in therapy may be asked by friends, family members or partners questions such as ‘Why, can’t you just talk to me about these things? Why do you need to see a therapist?'
This unique nature of the therapeutic relationship means that it is unlike those relationships we form and maintain in the real world. It is a relationship that is impartial, not based on the past or does not carry the judgements, feelings or dynamics that can be associated with our external relationships.
What are the characteristics of the therapeutic relationship?
The therapeutic relationship has many components and varies between each individual relationship. However, there are some common themes and characteristics which I have listed below:
Genuineness - it is crucial that the therapist be a ‘real’ human being, meaning that they are able to freely and deeply be themselves, not an all-knowing expert. They must be a real person who can relate to one another genuinely.
Empathy - this is the therapist’s ability to recognise, identify and understand the situation their client is experiencing and to understand their feelings, ideas and motivations. This is the basis and foundation for a therapeutic relationship because it establishes a personal connection between the therapist and client, allowing the client to see their therapist hears them, values and understands their needs.
Trusting and a non-judgemental attitude - for a therapeutic relationship to develop, grow and flourish, it is crucial a client feels their therapist is trustworthy. For clients who find it difficult to open up or explore their feelings due to worrying that it is not safe for them to do so, it matters greatly that they can feel confident that their therapist will not judge them.
Care and warmth - when entering the consulting room for the first time, or even meeting a new therapist after a break from therapy, there can be a sense of fear, trepidation and nervousness. Therefore, it is crucial that a therapist provide an environment that feels warm, caring and safe, in order for the client to feel they are able to share their feelings, ideas and thoughts.
Insight and experience- the insight and experience of a therapist allows them to understand in more depth, things that may have been said to draw attention to the language used, or a certain way that a client may be presenting within any given session. It is also important to note that the experience and insight of a client are also hugely important.
A therapist and client may be two very different people from different walks of life, but in this relationship evolves the ability to understand sharing experiences and to find new knowledge emerging. This joint learning and creative experience can make therapy so rewarding for both the client and the therapist. It is this mutual meeting and exchanging of experiences that increase the power of talking therapies.”
Hats off to Joshua Miles
All book extracts are shown in italics.
This blog has extracts from: ‘Why the therapeutic relationship matters? published on 29-06-2015 in the Counselling Directory.